There was a little girl, who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead,
And when she was good, she was very, very good,
But when she was bad she was horrid.Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. (American poet, 1807-1882)
This excerpt always comes to mind when I think about my emotions because
When I’m happy, I’m very, very happy
and when I’m sad, I’m miserable…
Also this:
I am a person of intense, passionate feelings.
My high’s are oh, so high – and my lows… well, they run deep.
I do try to stay on the positive side of the line, and often float so high on life that I feel like my heart is glowing, my soul is singing and that every single cell in my body is a tiny little mini me, dancing like no one’s watching under exploding fireworks!
Inevitably though, what goes up must come down…
The classic case of post birthday blues; or a despondent melancholy such as occured after ‘Les Miserables’ ended – The sheer intensity and overwhelming experience of being involved in something so much bigger than myself left quite a gaping hole after the final curtain came down, and I must admit it took some months to adjust to ‘normal’ life again. Sometimes there’s just a little dark cloud over my head and heart for seemingly no reason at all…
If you imagine emotions as soundwaves, it is easy to visualise the variable intensity and polarity of feelings. The higher the crest, the greater our experience of love/joy/excitement/hope/connectedness. The deeper the trough, the more profound our sadness/anger/fear/pain/helplessness.
Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have quieter emotions. To live more neutrally and closer to the mid-line.
Here’s the thing though.
The deeper I dive, the greater the rebound and the higher I can fly.
If our negative emotions balance our positive ones, then I wouldn’t give up a single second of the tough times in my life if it meant missing out on feeling the joyful times so completely.
So even though the down days can be damn difficult, challenging and uncomfortable, I try to acknowlege and accept them for what they are in order to experience and FEEL life in all it’s ups and downs.
My Wobbly Life 